whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
And then my night got REAL pukey
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
