Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
