was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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