Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
