Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
