Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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