just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
How's work?
Spinning.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
