It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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