he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I AM VODKA MAN
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
i need some magic done to my vagina
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Randomize
