I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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