Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
