I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize