oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
