I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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