He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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