you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I wear drunk well.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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