Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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