I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
So much rum. So many feels.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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