I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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