The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
