you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
