I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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