i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
