Umm I'm too high to move.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
