No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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