the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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