We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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