I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
