The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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