Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Randomize
