I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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