Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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