i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize