We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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