Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
