I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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