Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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