she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
