I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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