He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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