The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Randomize
