Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
