hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
