Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
