Sponge bath it is.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
