so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
