with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
