I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
