It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Randomize