Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
