I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Randomize
